Author: Jamie O’Neill
Rating: 2/5
Jim Mack and Doyler Doyle make a pact in 1915 to swim to Muglins Rock in Easter of 1916. But horrible stuff gets in the way. 
Spoilers ahead.
Detailed Summary
It’s 1915. Jim goes to school on a scholarship so he’s looked down upon by his classmates. Doyler Doyle returns to Dublin and would have received a scholarship but left school to find work to support his family. Their fathers both served in the army and were best friends until Mr. Mack made a comment about Doyle’s buttons being greasy. Jim regularly goes to Catholic school and is Brother Polycarp’s favourite. They have extra praying sessions where Jim is touched weirdly by the brother. Doyler joins the flute band and he and Jim become good friends like before. Doyler teaches Jim to swim at Forty Foot and they make a pact to swim to Muglins Rock next Easter. Jim is told he has a vocation for becoming a brother of the church. He turns down Brother Polycarp’s offer. The brother becomes very upset and resigns (and has a stroke or something?). Madame Eveline MacMurrough supports Ireland becoming free. Her nephew, Anthony MacMurrough, comes from England because he had committed “indecent acts.” Aunt Eva wants him to get married to redeem their family name. MacMurrough keeps talking to his dead friend Scrotes about homosexuality. Doyler works to and one of his jobs is to perform sexual favours. He sleeps with MacMurrough for money though Doyler loves Jim. Doyler tries to make a move on Jim but is rejected mainly because Jim is scared. Doyler is a Socialist and he’s forced to leave the flute band because of his Red Hand pin. He leaves to join the Irish Citizen Army after promising Jim that they’ll still do the swim together. In 1916, Jim is still upset about Doyler leaving. He becomes close to MacMurrough who continues his swimming lessons and teaches him about homosedxuality and philosoy. MacMurrough is borderline obsessed with Doyler and Jim’s relationship. Jim’s brother Gordie (who was off at war) is MIA. His girlfriend Nancy becomes pregnant and gives birth to a girl. Before Easter, Doyler goes to Jim and the two confess their love. They swim to Muglins the next day and have sex. On their way back, Doyler almost drowns. MacMurrough had been keeping an eye on them in his boat and comes to the rescue. Doyler recovers at MacMurrough’s house. Since Doyler is missing his soldier duties, Jim quietly takes his place to join the cause. MacMurrough and Doyler freak out and look for Jim. They become targetted by British guns. Doyler throws himself in front of Jim and is shot dead. MacMurrough and Jim are taken hostage (I think?) and MacMurrough tells Jim they’ll live on an island together and be happy. Jim dreams about Doyler and, even in later years, is haunted by thoughts and memories of Doyler.
Plot and Pacing
ARGH, I wanted to like this book so much! I had been looking forward to reading it for, like, EVER but I was ultimately disappointed. At Swim, Two Boys is a coming-of-age story set in Ireland right before the Easter Rising. The friendship and love between Jim and Doyler is the sweetest and so damn wholesome. Of course, the whole time reading, I was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I was sure that Doyler was going to die because, well, it feels like so many queer stories are like that? Where the more rambunctious one of the two dies? Though, truth be told, I can’t name any books with that plotline off the top of my head (The Song of Achilles, kind of? I mean, both of them die so perhaps not.). And I was proven right! I think my biggest issue with this book was how much of it wasn’t about Jim and Doyler. I wish O’Neill had focused on them. I didn’t care about MacMurrough nor did I want to know so much about Mr. Mack and the things he found weird or whatnot. I wanted more Jim and Doyler! That 2/5–that’s all for Jim and Doyler. I mean, phrases like “What cheer, eh?” and “old pal o’ me heart” had my goddamn heart racing. Can you imagine someone saying that to you? How bloody grand! How delightful.
Characters
Both Jim and Doyler have such special places in my heart. I loved how innocent Jim was. I think that’s what attracted both Doyler and MacMurrough to him. There’s this very pure quality about him. I also loved how he played the flute because I play the flute too! It was also cute to read about him bonding with Doyler while they both swam because I love swimming! So, seriously, this book was just tailor-made for me which makes it all the more disappointing that I didn’t enjoy it as much as I hoped to. I loved Jim’s development. He starts out very timid and unsure of his sexuality. He knows he likes Doylers as more than a friend but he’s too scared to act on his feelings. Then later, he becomes quite coy, even flirting with MacMurrough and just being so sweet. There’s this scene where MacMurrough reassures him that he doesn’t need to do anything but smile at someone to show him his love and Jim does just that for MacMurrough. And DKLFJD what a precious little cinnamon roll! The only thing that made that weird to me was how MacMurrough had feelings for Jim? In my head, I imagined MacMurrough to be like thirty? I don’t know how old he actually was meant to be but their relationship felt like a pedophilic one and I wasn’t very comfortable with that.
Then there’s Doyler, the rascal who can charm the pants off of any warm-blooded human being. I liked how protective he was of Jim and told MacMurrough not to touch Jim at any cost. I loved how determined and brash he was. I was heartbroken when he left Jim in 1915 and then super excited when he sought him in 1916 and they did their Easter swim after all. It was astonishing how the two boys understood each other and wanted the other to be happy. The whole schoolteacher dream Doyler had made my heart hurt and he was just so gentle and vulnerable. I was getting some serious Stede Bonnet/Blackbeard vibes from the two of them (watch Our Flag Means Death if you haven’t done so yet!!!).
Writing Style
“What cheer, eh?” and “Old pal o’ me heart” DKLFJDS ❤
I’m STILL swooning!!! But other than that, I felt very torn about the writing. I liked that it was so heavy on Irish jargon (is that the right term?). It was hard to get into at first but after about fifty pages, I didn’t notice it as much. My one gripe (as I’ve already mentioned) is how little time Jim and Doyler actually got. I thought this was going to be their story but MacMurrough and Brother Polycarp and Aunt Eva and a few others narrate quite a few large chunks of the book and I was so sick of it. I wanted the two boys! I wasn’t particularly invested in anyone else. I also got very annoyed whenever O’Neill changed tenses. Sometimes, the book would be in past tense, sometimes present. Sometimes, there would be first-person, sometimes third-. I would have preferred for thoughts to be italicised–that’s just a personal thing. To me, it wasn’t a seamless experience reading. Rather, I found myself having to reread sections to figure out who was thinking what and who was narrating what.
Overall, I just don’t think this book was really for me.
Earnestly Eccentric 